Joining the Army of the Night

Bloodstained Ritual of the Night

Tea: No tea, only blood from a silver chalice

This is bit of an unusual article and I don’t quite know under what category to file it, so I just went with Essay, because I can’t be bothered to create a new category with just one article in it. This in return means that this will be sort of a one-off thing. So bear with me if you will:

Two weeks ago my attention was drawn to a rather unique Kickstarter. A new game by the master of Metroidvania-stlye gameplay Koji Igarashi. Bloodstained Ritual of the Night is a new game in the gothic horror style that publishers declared long dead. IGA had been thrown out by Konami, who seem to be on a roll with bad decisions recently. Being a Castlevania fan I naturally supported the project. Now, I do not want to rally up more backers, I just want to give you a small insight into my relationship with Castlevania and why I backed the project and perhaps you will check it out yourself.

Continue reading


No need for a God

Ex Machina

Tea: Orange-Basil-Chilli Tea (an unconventional, yet oddly soothing mixture)

Ex Machina is not like the name might suggest a series of convenient plot developments, but a Sci-Fi movie written and directed by Alex Garland. The movie is centred around the reclusive Nathan and his guest of honour Caleb. Nathan has been working on an AI and now wants Caleb to test its, or rather her, capabilities as a possible human being. Soon after meeting the AI, named Ava, things start to grow strange as Caleb is unsure of the true nature of things. That is all I am going to say about the plot. Continue reading

Nothing is new, everything is copy-pasted

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate

Tea: (Hot water, actual tea was Xbone exclusive pre-order content)

Advanced Marketing and Backward Game Development

To start off, I actually enjoyed SOME Assassin’s Creed games. Mainly the Ezio ones. Altair was too much of a cunt and Connor wasn’t much of anything. A line from Pulp Fiction springs to mind: “Because you are a character doesn’t mean you have character.” Edward Kenway wasn’t as engaging as Ezio, even though the developers tried so hard they might as well have taped a picture of Ezio to Edward’s face. But the gameplay made up for that by a ton. Not having played Unity, Syndicate comes along: Continue reading

Sherlock Holmes and the Shattered Mirror – Chapter 1

Sherlock Holmes and the Shattered Mirror



Steffen Donath


Chapter I


Alpha and Omega


It was a rainy Tuesday, what other weather could one expect to find in London. With his briefcase held over his head Dr Hooper ran for cover against the heavenly assault. He barely made it into the hallway of the house. The old building from of the Victorian era had a gold plate at the front door which read: Continue reading

The Fault in Our Writing

The Fault in Our Stars

Tea: Gunpowder – Temple of Heaven (I needed divine help for this movie)

Full spoilers for the movie, you are not missing anything anyway

Disclaimer: I haven’t read the book of the same name by John Green

Every once in a while someone will yank on my chain that binds me to society and drag me to some social event. This time I was blessed with watching “The Fault in Our Stars” a movie about a bunch of teens with cancer. A truly entertaining experience, until I noticed I wasn’t laughing at the parts I apparently was supposed to. Given our society a cancer movie cannot be bad, since cancer is a serious issue. So what am I going to say? 10/10, need to watch.

But I wouldn’t be the critic I think I am, if I couldn’t legitimately criticise this movie, so here we go: Continue reading



Tea: Ginger Lemon (spicy and sour, yet oddly soothingly sweet, just like Bloodborne)

Bloodborne is a Souls-Game by From Software. I am calling it that, since that is basically its own genre now, or rather the niche From Soft has cut out for itself. As a result it features similar controls and a similar brutal level of controller-crushing difficulty. Harsh critics would call it a palette swap of any other Souls game, now dipped into a nice big pot of blood and Victorian scenery. And for some aspects that holds true. A lot of usable items have just received a new name and icon, but basically stay the same. Just like the world’s currency, which is referred to as blood echoes, but I will continue to call souls until my dying day as it is shorter to say. Continue reading

Welcome to my critical teatime

Greetings fellow traveler of the modern wasteland,

It would seem you have stumbled about this peculiar page. What brought you here? I do not know. But I can tell you what you might find here. This is the realm of my cynical self-expression. Any review, interpretation, or essay that crosses my twisted mind will sooner or later end up here. You might as well read it, since it is already here. What you won’t find are numeric scores and on-time reviews. Yet, if you are interested in reading what a person you don’t and will never know has to say about certain entertainment media then you have come to the right place.