Nothing is new, everything is copy-pasted

Assassin’s Creed Syndicate

Tea: (Hot water, actual tea was Xbone exclusive pre-order content)

Advanced Marketing and Backward Game Development

To start off, I actually enjoyed SOME Assassin’s Creed games. Mainly the Ezio ones. Altair was too much of a cunt and Connor wasn’t much of anything. A line from Pulp Fiction springs to mind: “Because you are a character doesn’t mean you have character.” Edward Kenway wasn’t as engaging as Ezio, even though the developers tried so hard they might as well have taped a picture of Ezio to Edward’s face. But the gameplay made up for that by a ton. Not having played Unity, Syndicate comes along:

I am actually not really going to talk about the game, aside from the fact that I thought the main character would be the villain, judging from his top hat that only missed a mustache he could twirl while your love interest lies tied up on a train track. No, it’s the fact that the gameplay shown to me is said to be pre-alpha. Calling something “pre-alpha” is a bit paradoxical to begin with, but I get it. You are still working on it and are a bit shy to show me what you have to offer. All fair game, even though you are expecting people to go: “Wow, pre-alpha? It will look amazing by the time I can buy it.” Until their dreams are inevitably shattered by another Watch_Dogs that somehow also managed to look worse than its first outing.

What really brings me to a boil is the fact that in the same breath they speak the words “pre-alpha” the already have an array of special editions and pre-order bonuses ready for you. So you don’t have the guts to tell us what your final game will look like, but expect me to pre-order it Ubisoft? Does your marketing department sit in a different country? Is that why you put those multi-ethnic disclaimers at the start of every game? It should be a given at this point that pre-ordering is nothing more than a clever business trick for game publishers to keep making the mediocre Call of Duty knock-off every year and yes, by extent this holds true for AC as well. It almost hurts to write that, since I enjoyed this series once, but now it has just devolved into an annual franchise with barely any imagination thrown into it.

I will not pre-order this game, or even buy it at full price, Ubisoft, if you continue to treat me like a money-machine you just need to put a new AC title with a fancy subtitle in every year, as a side note: start numbering your titles again! It will get confusing as hell two years down the line. I envy people who still think that they will get a flawless and fresh game, I would like to live in such an innocent world. But ours is a harsh reality my friend and this time the faces of the characters will be only part of the collector’s edition set at 140,-$.

For reference-sake:


2 thoughts on “Nothing is new, everything is copy-pasted

  1. *slurping hot water while frowning* I totally agree with you: AC is a big money machine for Ubisoft which they will use as long as possible with the least possible effort. There´s just no innovation, no new and fresh concept. It´s okay for a time, but slowly but surely it´s getting old (or rather very fast and very certainly).
    However, in one respect, I have to back up the series: the representation of historical events and persons (e.g. Marquis de Sade) is astonishingly accurate and shows how much background research Ubisoft invests when creating their characters. On the other hand it is quite disappointing to have to acknowledge that most AC NPCs are far more interesting than the main protagonist. And what do we learn from that: history always writes the best stories and Ubisoft basically just copy-and-pastes it…


    • Their historical accuracy is not to be frowned upon. Although I would take it with a grain of salt: This is a problem with the more recent games rather that the early ones. Historical figures seem to be doing exactly what they are known for the moment you meet them (appart form ben Franklin who is strangely enough not being struck by lightning. But there might have been a DLC I didn’t play). Signing declarations of independence, setting their beard on fire etc. The older historical setting allowed for a much more diverse character creation since nobody had any idea of what they were truly like. You can turn Leonardo Da Vinci into a slightly girly and quirky scientist, implying a may be existing relationship with Ezio (or at least the greatest bromance in history). You cannot do the same for, say, George Washington. But if I had to choose I’d take interesting characters over historical accuracy. Thank you for your comment as always and enjoy the hot water.


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